Funny, I remember being a little kid and whenever someone would say "Thank you" when others of us forgot, I'd feel bad for saying it after them because it made it seem like we didn't really mean it, we just forgot. It was horrible. Especially with my parents 'cause I never really knew when. Or when my brother said it before me.
So from then on I made it a point to always say it first. And so I do, and I don't ever forget now.
If we're like going in turns and it's just the person in front of me that starts saying thank you then oh well. A smile helps.
I wonder about those people, you know, who's eyes are sad? They're just really hurting you know? You can tell they're being so hurt and they're sad. It's not really their fault, and sometimes you can see why and sometimes it isn't obvious.
I wonder if you could see that if you looked into my eyes. My parents won't, they can't, because they don't think it's possible that I could be that sad. They would think my home life isn't that tragic at all compared to who they see. They don't know that though. For all they know I could be, but they won't see it.
Getting onto adrenaline was something I was thinking about before, and how I could get into it. I mean I was partially thinking of it because my mom said "Sometimes crying is good for your soul." Bitch please, it just releases endorphins which make you feel good. I can get on adrenaline from being around my friends, I used to, now it's kind of normal but I can be on adrenaline highs pretty easy, I mean, just seeing something I think is cool (but isn't at all like four people doing the exact same thing or having the same expression I don't even know) can make me excited or say just a hug. Now that nearly killed me last Friday.
But I feel like the only time I'm really happy is when I'm on adrenaline. Otherwise I'm in a bit of a stressed out mood. Or deliriously happy (I mean, I'm tired, so I'm running off excitement) <- when I'm at rehearsal for 3 hours at night after a long day but the excitement is just playing, it makes no sense.
So, because of that, you'd never tell if I really am sad because my body is emitting this energy. And what if you get sad and tired confused? I'm generally always the same level of tiredness but my eyes....I don't know what's in them. On another note, 80's and Queen is happy music.
Another thing. You look at people's faces and their eyes and they match how they act and their brain and who they are and ect, it just matches their essence and soul. I don't match.....at all. At least I don't think so. If you saw my face you'd think of something else. Then again there's nothing really like me at all. I have quite a unique childhood, okay, and I don't even know.
So I had a whole shpeel of good thoughts so I'm going to post it next.
So from then on I made it a point to always say it first. And so I do, and I don't ever forget now.
If we're like going in turns and it's just the person in front of me that starts saying thank you then oh well. A smile helps.
I wonder about those people, you know, who's eyes are sad? They're just really hurting you know? You can tell they're being so hurt and they're sad. It's not really their fault, and sometimes you can see why and sometimes it isn't obvious.
I wonder if you could see that if you looked into my eyes. My parents won't, they can't, because they don't think it's possible that I could be that sad. They would think my home life isn't that tragic at all compared to who they see. They don't know that though. For all they know I could be, but they won't see it.
Getting onto adrenaline was something I was thinking about before, and how I could get into it. I mean I was partially thinking of it because my mom said "Sometimes crying is good for your soul." Bitch please, it just releases endorphins which make you feel good. I can get on adrenaline from being around my friends, I used to, now it's kind of normal but I can be on adrenaline highs pretty easy, I mean, just seeing something I think is cool (but isn't at all like four people doing the exact same thing or having the same expression I don't even know) can make me excited or say just a hug. Now that nearly killed me last Friday.
But I feel like the only time I'm really happy is when I'm on adrenaline. Otherwise I'm in a bit of a stressed out mood. Or deliriously happy (I mean, I'm tired, so I'm running off excitement) <- when I'm at rehearsal for 3 hours at night after a long day but the excitement is just playing, it makes no sense.
So, because of that, you'd never tell if I really am sad because my body is emitting this energy. And what if you get sad and tired confused? I'm generally always the same level of tiredness but my eyes....I don't know what's in them. On another note, 80's and Queen is happy music.
Another thing. You look at people's faces and their eyes and they match how they act and their brain and who they are and ect, it just matches their essence and soul. I don't match.....at all. At least I don't think so. If you saw my face you'd think of something else. Then again there's nothing really like me at all. I have quite a unique childhood, okay, and I don't even know.
So I had a whole shpeel of good thoughts so I'm going to post it next.
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