It's amazing how much effect some people have on you even if you haven't given them that much power over you. You know you have given them some but it's all a safe level. Unfortunately when it's out of your control whether they have power or not it's somewhat irrational....which is what I'm referencing here.
Yesterday was pretty much traumatic :p and fun, but I could've cried a couple times and I swear I spent most of it being scared x) (hey this is all the the good way, if there is one) but it was a great day, only I didn't feel that way at the end because it didn't end good. And I remembered all the wonderful things that happened that day but I didn't feel it. Didn't get the vibe you get when they happen. Which is sad. Just one blow...
And same as today. I was worried to death about 3 different people, who mean a lot to me but they worry me at the same time, and our relationships are so weird and that's what really worries me, there's a lot of places any of them could fail in which would be horrible. It was bugging me all day; they were just on my mind all the time, but then after school I'm in robotics club with them.
Looking back it was a good club day, it was pretty cool and fun. I just said club. The whole day was kinda suckish and meh and meh yeah. Bad. And now that I know our relationships aren't in danger AND we got over one awkward thing in our relationship (relationship fails if you can't get through awkward) where they all met my mom. Yeeeeeahhhhh that was bad. But I love those boys and anyways now that that's clear, that issue, I realize that today was actually an amazing day. It was a pretty good day!! Ignore the next sentence as it is a reference for myself...sorry. In the morning we were laughing about a friend's dream, I actually got Biology work done, engineering with a new friend at brunch was great, PE was fun doing relay sprints and my friend said I was fast (:D), math was chummy with my table mates, we seem to be getting closer, orchestra was fun or cool with the teacher, and English I spent moping about the 3 but laughed a lot too, then robotics was awesome. I can't ask for more.
Is it dangerous? The effect the problem of three relationships stopped me from enjoying a wonderful day and made me all mopey and thinking it was horrible. Talk about reality distortions and perspectives....oh that's a fun subject.
Yesterday was pretty much traumatic :p and fun, but I could've cried a couple times and I swear I spent most of it being scared x) (hey this is all the the good way, if there is one) but it was a great day, only I didn't feel that way at the end because it didn't end good. And I remembered all the wonderful things that happened that day but I didn't feel it. Didn't get the vibe you get when they happen. Which is sad. Just one blow...
And same as today. I was worried to death about 3 different people, who mean a lot to me but they worry me at the same time, and our relationships are so weird and that's what really worries me, there's a lot of places any of them could fail in which would be horrible. It was bugging me all day; they were just on my mind all the time, but then after school I'm in robotics club with them.
Looking back it was a good club day, it was pretty cool and fun. I just said club. The whole day was kinda suckish and meh and meh yeah. Bad. And now that I know our relationships aren't in danger AND we got over one awkward thing in our relationship (relationship fails if you can't get through awkward) where they all met my mom. Yeeeeeahhhhh that was bad. But I love those boys and anyways now that that's clear, that issue, I realize that today was actually an amazing day. It was a pretty good day!! Ignore the next sentence as it is a reference for myself...sorry. In the morning we were laughing about a friend's dream, I actually got Biology work done, engineering with a new friend at brunch was great, PE was fun doing relay sprints and my friend said I was fast (:D), math was chummy with my table mates, we seem to be getting closer, orchestra was fun or cool with the teacher, and English I spent moping about the 3 but laughed a lot too, then robotics was awesome. I can't ask for more.
Is it dangerous? The effect the problem of three relationships stopped me from enjoying a wonderful day and made me all mopey and thinking it was horrible. Talk about reality distortions and perspectives....oh that's a fun subject.
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